kilnashee

I decided to move my journal over to blogger.  I like the features and layout better there.  So, all future posts from me can be found at:

To A Pretty Life

See you there!

This was my backyard on Saturday, the day after I was outside with a t-shirt and no jacket.  Oh well, at least I know my bulbs are still under all that mess.

On a more cheerful note, I want to show off my kitchen curtains.  They make me happy.





    

The ties are just wide satin ribbon tacked to the wall with upholstery tacks.  Thanks to The Nester for the idea of upholstery tacks.  She's very clever and has a beautiful house.  I wish she could come "mistreat" my house.

And here's what's hiding behind my curtains  (my first successful seed-starting):



If I don't end up killing them, I will have fresh basil this summer!  (and some marigolds)

PS: I'm considering switching to a different blog server.  There are several things I don't like about livejournal.  What I do like is that my friends (all two of them) can see my updates...that's why I'm hesitating.

We have had such nice weather here for the past 2 months that I have had to keep reminding myself that it's not spring yet.  We should get at least one more significant snowfall.  Even though the spring equinox has passed, I still have a hard time believing that we are getting such an early spring.  Until yesterday when I happened to look at the snow-less parts of my front garden.  There, lo and behold, I discovered that some of my bulbs are sprouting!  Wow, it really must be spring! 





And for fun, there is the upside-down view out my living room window on a cloudy day:

JK was not very happy on her first Easter Sunday.  I'm afraid that all my family thinks that she is always cranky.  She's not, she's just teething. 

"A house should have nooks and crannies about, where one would love to linger" - Alexander Jackson Davis, architect

"Every house must have something in its aspect which the heart can fasten upon and become attached to" - A.J. Downing, architect

Summertime,
And the livin' is easy
Fish are jumpin'
And the cotton is high

Your daddy's rich
And your mamas good lookin'
So hush little baby
Don't you cry

One of these mornings
You're gonna rise up singing
Then you'll spread your wings
And you'll take to the sky

But till that morning
There's nothing that can harm you
With mama and daddy standing by

Summertime,
And the livin' is easy
Fish are jumpin'
And the cotton is high

Your daddy's rich
And your mamas good lookin'
So hush little baby
Don't you cry

- by George Gershwin (the version I like is recored by Theresa Sokyrka)

My husband and I were talking about what kind of home we want to eventually live in.  He doesn’t understand my aversion to modern subdivisions.  I don’t understand it completely either, so here is my attempt to understand why driving through a brand new subdivision with its rows of shiny cookie-cutter houses and baby trees just makes me shudder to think of living there.  (Note: I’m sure my thoughts won’t be organised, since I’m writing each point as I think of it.)

Why can’t modern architects design houses where the front door is the focal point of the exterior?  The garage door is all one can see from the street, and the timid front door seems to be afraid to have anyone come for a visit.  It’s unfriendly.

 Why can’t they design houses that look good from the back too?  Sure the front needs to look pretty, but the thought of a plain square backyard, and a plain rear elevation with no thought to window placement or aesthetics just gives me chills.

 In this area, builders often include nice details borrowed from older styles (Victorian, Craftsman, etc), like 5-inch baseboards, nice doorway mouldings, and hardwood floors.  But such things in homes with vaulted ceilings, 2-story windows, and unfriendly garages just seem like a costume…rather like a stage set.

 Speaking of vaulted and cathedral ceilings, I think they make a room seem cold and impersonal.  The huge windows have the same effect…except when the south-west sun shines in during the summer…then it’s unbearably hot!

 I don’t like neighbourhoods where every house is a slight variation of the same three plans.  I don’t want all my neighbours to have exactly the same home layout as I do!  This is said by a person who currently is enjoying living in a townhouse-style condo.  I think I don’t have a problem with our townhouse because I know it’s not my forever home.  We’ll be here for a few more years and then move on…providing we can afford to buy a house at whatever the prices will be by then.  We may be stuck here forever unless we move to another province!

 I don’t like cramped entryways.  I don’t like having only 5-feet of space between my house and the next.  I don’t like such open plan layouts.  I don’t like having no windows on the sides of the house.  I don’t like small backyards.  I don’t like useless fake porches (they’re about 3-feet by 5-feet, and not good for anything).  I don’t like wasted attic space or fake gable windows.  I don’t like too-high windows or horizontal windows.  I don’t like a tv-niche over the fireplace.  I don’t like puny fireplace mantles.  I don’t like home-owner’s associations, or rules about what colours the fence has to be, etc.

 Just so that this post is not completely negative, here’s what I do like about modern houses:  I do like large bathtubs and walk-in closets.  I like the lower maintenance and no renovations.  I like large shiny-new kitchens and stone countertops.  I like main-floor laundry rooms.  I like attached garages (which should be at the side or back of the house).

 I’m not sure if I’m finished with this topic yet, but I have several things to get done this afternoon.  I may write another post about this once I've done more thinking.

(picture is from www.ballarddesigns.com)

I came across this picture on someone's blog, and these lovely moss eggs that sell for $79.95 for a set of three just looked so easy that I couldn't resist trying to make them.  I didn't have any styrofoam eggs, but I didn't really want an egg shape anyway.  A sphere is way more versatile.

My first attempt took me 5 minutes to make, and I used only material I already had in the house.  I have since made another one and paired the two balls with a clove ball (that took me 5 hours to make)...they make my bathroom look and smell so lovely.  I love saving $75.00 this way.  It makes me feel so clever!

I love yellow tulips.  Especially in my turquoise kitchen!

I like what Lindsey has to say about Christians celebrating Halloween:

"I know many Christian families do not celebrate ANY part of Halloween, and I don't particularly want to open this post up for a bunch of arguing, but in our family, we do participate in some Halloween activities. It is just one thing we do and we don't do it because we're evil or want to celebrate something unnatural or evil. We have fun with it and we redeem it for the real reason---God created EVERY day. The devil doesn't get a day of his own! I always roll my eyes when some good-intentioned person tells me that Halloween is the devil's day. Not for us!"

http://justenjoythejourney.blogspot.com/2007/10/celebrating-autumn.html

We carve pumpkins and hand out candy on Halloween.  We had about 45 kids come by last year, and 32 the year before.  I love costumes (particularly historical ones), but I never actually dress up for Halloween...it's too much work for something that's not important to me ;-)

No, I am not twelve months pregnant.  My darling little girl was born in early July.  She is now three months old.  Since the only three people who ever read this already know about JK, I didn't worry about updating right away. 

I'm mostly settled in and getting used to being a mom, though I still have moments of disbelief.  I'm really a mom?  Wow!

JK doesn't like to sleep anywhere other than my arms during the day, but we're working on trying to get her to nap in her crib.  Because she doesn't nap much, she gets really cranky in the evenings.  JK also doesn't like car rides, so even though I currently have two vehicles to drive if I wanted to, I find myself staying home because I don't want to deal with a screaming baby--especially not in public.

She smiles and chatters, and loves looking at new faces.  Every Friday, we go for a walk in the river valley.  Sometimes friends join us, but usually it's just the two of us.

In September, I started a college English course that will count toward the degree I want to get.  It's going well, though I have yet to hand in my first essay.  This is my third course out of the 30 required.

I love old books.  Today I was restless and didn't want to stay home, so I went "window" shopping...This is what happens when a woman waiting for a baby to arrive gets restless:



I found two books that I have been wanting for years.  Tennyson is 101 years old...published in 1906.  The Chronicles of Avonlea is published in 1939.

I think I know why we have so many mosquitos in our back yard when they are not that bad in the rest of the neighbourhood: Our next-door neighbours have a 3 year old daughter...and she has a swimming pool that is always filled with water.  Augh!  They're breeding the enemy!  It's so bad that I can't even be in my garden for 5 minutes.  I need to find out if there is some way to kill all the mosquitos without harming the plants or us.  Normally I am opposed to pesticides, but this is rather ridiculous.

I am able to admire my garden from the window, and one day I managed to take a few pictures before I fled back inside.


(Pink Bleeding Heart)



(Clematis)



(English Boxwood)

Several people have asked me recently how my writing is going.  The only answer I have is "It's not".  It's rather embarrassing, since I used to write all the time, and when I was I kid, I was forever telling people that I was going to be a famous writer, and setting deadlines for myself for when I wanted to have a book published.  But why don't I write anymore?  I'm not 100% certain about that.  I think there are several reasons (no particular order):

1. I am no longer bored.  The reason I started writing stories when I was about 8 years old was because I was bored, and didn't have access to very many new books.  I wrote what I wanted to read.  I never ever finished any writing until I was in high school.  I always thought that was because I had too many ideas, but it was probably just because I lost interest in the original idea.

2. I grew up.  I now have a quite wide variety of interests, as well as access to the city's library, and enough budget leeway that I can occasionally buy a new book if I want to.  I also don't read as much now.

3. I am afraid.  I don't know if my writing is any good.  My highschool English teacher liked it, but other than her, I've had no professional critique.  I don't think I know how to carry a plot.  The one good (I think) story I ever completed doesn't have a plot...It's really just a series of images.  I think I have written a lot of decent opening paragraphs...but then the idea fizzles and I can't bring back the excitement I had when I first got the idea.  I have one half-finished story that still has promise, and I have no excuse for not finishing it yet except for fear.

4. I feel creatively stifled.  The past 5 years have been spent earning money while my husband completes his degree.  I feel like the daily monotony has slowly sapped my creativity.  I find it hard to believe that I have spent nearly half a decade accomplishing nothing.  This is completely my own fault.  I know that I cannot improve my writing unless I write.  And writing inspires creativity.  But all I have done is work, eat, sleep, work, etc.  Most days I really feel like I cannot bear another second in front of the computer, after already working for 8 hours (and I'm not very good at writing in an organised manner when I'm composing on paper...as those who have received my letters can attest).

I do my best to ignore the self-reproaching sting that I feel whenever the subject is raised.  Maybe I'll get back into writing.  Maybe I won't.  If I don't, I will probably always feel like everyone I know sees me as a failure.  Of course, that thought probably doesn't even occurr to them.  It is rather nice that my friends care to inquire about my interests and hobbies.

These are just some things I have been contemplating in answer to those who ask about my writing.  Sorry for such a melancholy post...perhaps the next one will be more cheerful!

Today, almost 8 months pregnant:


And for comparison, here's me in January at around 4 months pregnant:


No wonder people keep asking me if I'm having twins.  It's not twins!

It's rather ironic that just 2 days after posting something about being content and feeling accomplished, I have a day in which absolutely nothing was done.  On Sunday something was wrong with my hip or something, and I could barely move.  My kitchen is a mess because I didn't wash the dishes.  Kevin was doing homework all day, so I had a very lazy day.  That must have been what I needed, because today I feel almost back to normal  (except for a rather itchy belly...I don't think my skin can stretch any more and I still have at least a month for the baby to grow).

We are having trouble assembling our change table.  It was used for my 2 young brothers-in-law when they were babies, and I think the top support has warped or expanded from moisture.  It no longer fits together properly.  I hope we don't have trouble with the crib!

I am thoroughly enjoying my garden this year.  It is so nice to not have to do any heavy landscaping work.  This year I get to spend my money on plants instead of bricks!  I'll have to take some more pictures of my new acquisitions.  I was very tempted by fruits and flowering shrubs, but I had to stick to my budget (birthday money), and I want to plant things that won't be to difficult to take with us whenever we move.  I have told Kevin that we must move in the summer because I'm not leaving my plants.  Now that I do have some more plants in the ground, I'm starting to get a better vision of what I want the garden to look like.  I want to plant a lot of bulbs this year, especially in the front.

I had a bit of a shock yesterday when I went out the front door on my way to buy groceries, and my daisies were all jumbled up in their pot with the dirt strewn down the steps.  Our neighbour has 3 kids, so I figured that someone bumped it.  It wasn't very stable anyway.  I have replanted the daisies and I think they'll survive, but today (if I can convince Kev to help before the hockey game), I need to stablise the place between our steps and our neighbours where the pot needs to be.  It was just sitting on a rather wobbly cinder block.

Speaking of my neighbours, when I was planting some things in my front garden on Saturday morning, our 3-year-old neighbour "helped" by keeping me company and chattering away.  Her mom says that she keeps asking when they are going to have a garden.

My official last day of work before maternity leave is June 17.  It was going to be June 16, but I volunteered to work on the Sunday so that they don't have to mess up anyone else's schedule to have coverage for that day.  Of course, if the baby decides to come by then, they will have to make other arrangements ;-)  So, barring anything unexpected, I only have 14 working days left!  I've been spending my downtime today trying to figure out the paperwork.  That's the trouble with a large company.  Too much paperwork!  (not that it's actually paper...almost everything is done on the computer).

I feel so content right now with my marriage, my housekeeping, and myself.  That is a rare happening.  I suspect that I was slightly depressed for more than two years.  I had almost no motivation for anything, I was lazy, and I could not dredge up even the slightest bit of self-discipline.  I didn't like myself very much.  Even through the first six months of my pregnancy, I could not make myself do anything.

Then in April, I took a week off of work.  I desperately needed that vacation, but I was terrified that I would waste the whole week and not get anything done.  So, I planned some projects (painting my kitchen and the baby's room), and made a very detailed to-do list.  I knew that wasn't good enough, because I have tried a simple list many times before, and have usually failed.  I took a pad of graph paper, and made seven columns, one for each day of the week.  Then I wrote on each day what I wanted to accomplish that day.  This method doesn't really sound different from a simple list, but somehow, it works!  I got most of my list done that week, and didn't feel like a failure for the things I didn't do.  

I have been keeping this up for about two months, and I feel terrific!  My house feels really clean for the first time (except for the basement and a few jobs that I haven't gotten to yet or can't do while I'm pregnant).  It is so satisfying.  I don't feel like having people over is a big burden, because the only things that need doing last-minute are sweeping the floors and polishing the bathroom.  Everything else is already done!

I also manage to remember things better, because I can write reminders on my worksheet for the appropriate day.  I have never felt so accomplished in my life.  I like myself again, and I don't feel like I can never relax because there is so much to do.  I am no longer afraid to be a stay-at-home mom.  I know that I can handle it (as long as I keep up with this system) and keep myself busy.

Anyway, that is how I've been feeling lately.  Housekeeping is no longer a burden.  I am calm and relaxed, and completely in love with my wonderful husband and my squirmy little baby.  It's a great feeling.

Surprise!  My Solomon's Seal is actually growing!  When I planted it last year, it withered and died almost right away, then the slugs finished it off.  I was sad, because it is such a beautiful plant and would look so nice in the shady part of my garden.  This morning, I noticed that it is actually growing!  There's new green stuff on the old root!  This is such a nice surprise for a beginning gardener.


(solomon's seal...see the green!)

Other things growing back in my garden are my hostas (3 of 4 show evidence of coming back), strawberries, woolly & creeping thyme, bleeding hearts (I have a white variety, and a pink variety), primrose, lavender, stone-crop, tulips, and my lovely old-rosebush that I bought myself for my birthday last year and told Kevin that it was from him.  Oh, and my sweet woodruff is spreading beautifully.  I think by next year, it will have the entire bed full like I wanted.


(primrose)

My crocuses are now finished...I only saw them open once because I was working on the only sunny days in the past month, and by the time I got home, they had already closed for the night.   I also inherited some grape hyacinth (I think that's what they are) from the previous owner of our house, and I think they are rather ugly.  I waited all last summer for the purple buds to open up and bloom until I realised that is all they do...they don't ever get pretty.  So I moved them last fall (rather, I threw them under a tree and moved some dirt over them...not caring whether they survive).  Some of them are blooming already, but they're about as impressive as last year. 

My lilac bush has leaves, and should bloom better this year, I hope.  It only had 3 flower clusters last year.

I just love my garden, as sparse as it is right now.  I'm glad I did all the back-breaking landscaping work last year...there is no way I'd ever be able to do the same thing this year.  Since I have next week off of work, I hope to finish with the clean up, and get some planting done.


(white bleeding heart)

Now, I'm off to water my rose bush.  It had a near-death-experience last summer during bloom-time, so I hope to avoid that this year.


(sweet woodruff)

Here is a picture of Kevin and me in Jasper.  His mother is right...I do always look tired in pictures!  I'll have to work on that.